REVIEW: Appaloosa (B-)

Last year, for no apparent reason, we moviegoers saw a whole lot of horses and 10-gallon hats when Hollywood suddenly dusted off The Western, a genre virtually nonexistent since the early 90's. Clearly, the resurgence was a success - witness 3:10 to Yuma, There Will Be Blood, The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford, and No Country for Old Men. Considering the last two listed were my #2 and #1 movies of 2007, and considering that 2007 was the Best Movie Year of the Last Decade, you might understand why I was looking forward so much to Appaloosa, the first (and maybe only?) Western of 2008.

And if you see it, you might also understand why I was disappointed to find it a tepid, vanilla-bland Western that offers little in the way of excitement and even less in the way of originality. Adapted from the novel of the same name by Robert Parker, Appaloosa is the pet project of Ed Harris (National Treasure 2), who produced, co-wrote, directed, starred, and even wrote and sang an original song for the soundtrack. It was an admirable effort, but I have to wonder if even Harris would admit something is still lacking, and if I had to zero on the problem I suspect I would land on the utterly conventional adaptation of the novel.

It's 1882 in New Mexico Territory. Randall Bragg (Jeremy Irons, in a welcome return to the big screen) and his gang of exaggeratedly idiotic cowboys are running loose in the town of Appaloosa. Desperate to restore order, the mayor contracts reputable lawman Virgil Cole (Harris) and his deputy, Everett Hitch (Viggo Mortenson, Eastern Promises), reluctantly giving them complete jurisdiction according to their preferred methods (Cole: "It's the law."; Mayor: "Your law."; Cole: "Same thing."). Cole wears every stereotypical character trait on his sleeve; just by looking at him you know that is hoping to retire soon, that he'd like to settle down with an honest woman, that he sometimes questions the purpose of his job, and that he'll never back down in a fight. Doesn't that describe pretty much every sheriff in every movie?

Slowly, methodically, the story plods along as Cole and Bragg trade veiled threats and hard stares, time and time again. Rarely given an opportunity to inject any emotion into his characters, Viggo Mortenson is mostly relegated here to leaning against walls and drinking coffee, his long-barrelled rifle always resting on his shoulder. Renee Zellweger eventually shows up as the widow Ali French, a flirty redhead that tries to remain faithful to Cole in this testosterone-fueled environment. Like her Dorothy Boyd in Jerry Maguire, Zellweger is stuck in a relationship with a detached workaholic; the difference being that Zellweger could actually express her emotions in Jerry Maguire. Who knew Botox was available in 1882?

I'm going to tell you how Appaloosa ends by not telling you how it ends. If you've seen one spaghetti Western, you've seen Appaloosa, which seems to check off every marker of the genre - ride off into the sunset included - to the point that it could play like a spoof, if it were only a comedy. Many of the superficial elements and set pieces are still well done (cinematography, musical score, production design, costumes), but they can't make up for the nagging feeling you have that the story isn't really going anywhere. The central dilemma of the story just isn't engaging, and that makes the fate of the characters trivial.

There weren't many spices in the food in 1882, but this meal probably had more flavor than this movie...

I've been critical of Appaloosa mostly because I expected more, and when there's little that leaves an impression on you, the negative aspects end up being what you remember. Appaloosa really isn't a bad movie, but there's little evidence that it's a special one. Last year's 3:10 to Yuma was a somewhat similar story, but even though it was a remake, Yuma still featured a more vibrant appearance, more intriguing characters, and more suspenseful action. In a high noon duel between 3:10 to Yuma and Appaloosa, the latter wouldn't even get its six-shooter unholstered.

Grade:
Writing - 8
Acting - 8
Production - 7
Emotional Impact - 8
Music - 5
Social Significance - 4

Total: 40/50= 80% = B-