Short Cuts: "Already Read 'Em"

Cape Fear (1991). Directed by Martin Scorsese; screenplay adapted by Wesley Strick; starring Robert De Niro, Nick Nolte, Juliette Lewis, Jessica Lange, Robert Mitchum, and Gregory Peck.

Underrated MOTM: The Abyss (1989)

I'm going deep for June's Underrated Movie of the Month (MOTM). Almost a decade before sinking the Titanic, James Cameron brought us out of the depths in The Abyss, an epic production that remains as impressive now as it was in 1989. Although it's lived on primarily as a result of its Academy Award-winning visual effects, I find the the real brilliance of the movie is that so much is done with so little. The story couldn't be any simpler: a bunch of people trapped on the edge of a bottomless ocean canyon. Something mysterious is coming up from the depths of it, and they don't know what it is.

On the idea behind the story, Cameron said this:

"I wanted to do the definitive diving movie. But what do you do? Show the beauties of the coral reef or the perils of killer sharks? Those films have already been done. What I wanted was to go into the realm that had always excited me the most because of its extremes and its absoluteness—I wanted to go deep into the ocean.

In high school, I participated in a weekly science seminar where different speakers were brought in to talk about everything from childbirth to the latest advances in physics. One of those speakers happened to be a commercial diver who had participated in an experiment in which he had breathed with a liquid in both lungs for something like forty-five minutes. That really blew my mind. Here was a guy who had used his lungs as a gill mechanism. From that seminar came the idea for a story I wrote about some scientists in a research installation on a cliff overlooking the Cayman Trough. Using liquid breathing suits, they began making forays into the deepest depths of the ocean—but no one who goes down the cliff comes back again."

The Abyss opened in August of 1989 with little fanfare and little in the way of praise aside from awe in its visual effects. Its cast was familiar to moviegoing audiences, though not necessarily comprised of bankable movie stars. Ed Harris was several years removed from The Right Stuff, and Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio had already passed her career peak, a Supporting Actress Oscar nomination for 1986's The Color of Money. Harris would muddle through tough guy roles for more than a decade after The Abyss until being nominated for Best Actor for Pollock in 2000. Mastrantonio's career, however, fell off sharply after 1992. She returned to the water in 2000 for The Perfect Storm (with a strict contract stipulation that she remain dry throughout filming - why even take the part?), but has otherwise settled with her family and held on to her title as the Oscar nominee (for an acting role) with the longest name in the history of the awards.

In addition to the absence of a major star, The Abyss was also plagued with production difficulties and a ballooning budget (much like Cameron's Titanic some years later). The cast had to undergo decompression on a regular basis from filming underwater, Mastrantonio reportedly had some kind of mental breakdown during filming, and tension filled the set while shooting progressed at an abandoned nuclear power plant.

And so, despite Cameron's legitimate success with The Terminator and Aliens, The Abyss would come and go as just another sci-fi popcorn movie for a hot summer afternoon. It would have been pretty amazing to see it in the theater (hint hint, 20th Century Fox - how about a Director's Cut rerelease on the 20th anniversary next year?).

Cameron would have massive success just two years later with Terminator 2: Judgement Day, and would of course go on to see Titanic receive 14 Oscar nominations in 1998. That achievement accomplished and with nothing left to prove, Cameron has not done much of popular significance in the last 10 years. Within his decade-spanning career, which includes some of the most notable sci-fi movies of the last 30 years, The Abyss remains little more than a cult favorite these days.

One of the things I find ironic about The Abyss is that despite my great fear of the deep sea, I don't actually find the movie that scary (which is fine, I think, as Cameron didn't set out to make a horror movie). That being said, there are moments of suspense and tension that quicken the pulse even after repeated viewings. Claustrophobics in particular may not be able to make it to the end of the movie. The rest of us may find just find ourselves involuntarily holding our breath as the movie progresses.

But the story is more than just an entertaining underwater adventure, which brings me back to the beginning. I'll admit there are some cheesy lines and cliched action sequences, but this is no Waterworld. Within the simple story of trapped divers, Cameron taps in Cold War-era paranoia, the complex relations between separated spouses, and, quite ambitiously, the origins and existence of mankind.

Said Cameron in an interview with the NYT's Lawrence Van Gelder in 1989: "This film uses underwater as an environment in a different way,'' he said, ''a bleak, almost lunar environment, where the barrenness of the environment makes it a crucible for human behavior - kind of man against the elements, how we bond together. Ultimately, it boils down to a story about love, personal challenge and adversity.''

To me, the possibility of alien life at the bottom of the ocean is much different than the possibility of life in outer space, for the simple fact that we've all actually been in the ocean; it's finite, and it's been part of our daily lives for millennia. But how well do we really know it and, well, what if...?

I don't think there are aliens at the bottom of the ocean. I just think it's a cool idea, and one that's beautifully demonstrated in The Abyss, one of the only movies to even approach that kind of story. Even if someone were to make another attempt, there's just no way they could achieve the level of realism seen in The Abyss, because if anybody knows what they're doing underwater, it's James Cameron. What are the chances actual water would even be used in a 2008 version of The Abyss?

Those days are over, but at least some cool movies were made before the end of the era.

Back Soon

Wedding #1 is over. I made it through a weekend in Napa Valley without having to pretend like I'm an oenophile. I was almost on "The Real Housewives of Orange County", but that's a different story.

Now I'm back down in the Bay Area, wandering around Berkeley and San Francisco before heading to Las Vegas and then back to the Twin Cities for Wedding #2. Such is summer.

Who knew there was more to Berkeley than protests and an organic lifestyle? Just kidding, this really is a cool place that, in my opinion, suffers from the weight of its reputation. For example, there are three movie theaters within sight here on Shattuck Ave. in Berkeley, a fact that somehow escaped my attention last time I was here. WALL-E is pretty much the only thing I haven't seen, though it is nice to see Up the Yangtze and Encounters at the End of the World already in release here.

It's nice to be back in California for a while.

School Ties

I've mentioned at least once on here that I attended Boston University. It's an alright place that wouldn't otherwise be worth mentioning again, but the spring issue of the alumni magazine "Bostonia" brought to light some interesting details about my alma mater:

A Class I Wouldn't Have Skipped:

If you're anything like me, you rarely let movies get away with obvious violations of the physical laws of the universe - "There's no way he could have jumped from here to there!", "Wouldn't they have been killed on impact from that?", etc. Unbelievably, there's now a course devoted to those questions.

Indeed, a genius (in the that's-so-cool sense and also the literal sense) professor named Andy Cohen teaches Cinema Physica,"an introductory physics course for nonscience majors. Every week, Cohen’s students watch movies such as Unbreakable, The Sixth Sense, and Armageddon, and use class discussions and labs to examine the basic physics driving the high-octane scenes."

"The subtitle of this course should be Bruce Willis Saves the World," Cohen tells students with a laugh. The purpose of analyzing all the explosions and heroics, he explains, is to give humanities majors a truer sense of what science is — a quest for discovery rather than for memorized formulas and precise answers...When one student suggests using an equation, Cohen pounces. “Don’t say equation,” he says. “I never want to hear the word equation in this class. I hate equations.”

Tell me something better than that. Too bad I was science major and had to take a full year of physics - the kind with lots of equations that I didn't understand.


Harrison Ford IS Indiana Jones:

BU somehow gets linked up with Indy 4.

"Meanwhile, the real Indiana Jones — actor Harrison Ford, that is — was elected to the board of directors of the Archaeological Institute of America (AIA), which is based at Boston University. AIA president Brian Rose says Ford “has played a significant role in stimulating the public’s interest in archaeological exploration.” It’s a role Ford evidently takes seriously. “Knowledge is power,” he said in a press release announcing the news, “and understanding the past can only help us in dealing with the present and the future."


These Are 6 Who "Made It?":

BU has a pretty solid acting program from my memory, though I think it's stronger in theater than it is in film or television. In "From BU to Hollywood," we meet six alumni who "have made it in one of the toughest businesses there is." They are:

• Alfre Woodard, Actress, Class of 1974 ("Desperate Housewives," Oscar nomination for Cross Creek)
• Michael Chiklis, Actor, Class of 1986 ("The Shield," "The Commish")
• Ronna Kress, Casting Director, Class of 1984 (National Treasure 2: Book of Secrets)
• Gary Fleder, Director, Class of 1985 (Kiss the Girls, the upcoming The Express)
• Emily Deschanel, Actress, Class of 1998 (Glory Road, "Bones")
• Krista Vernoff, Screenwriter, Class of 1993 ("Grey's Anatomy") - doesn't she look exactly like Katherine Heigl?

They're fine and all, but then I found this list:

• Jason Alexander - Big one. I still beam with pride when I watch "Seinfeld".
• Geena Davis - Quick, name her last movie!...umm...
• David Dinerstein - Executive at Lakeshore Entertainment, which this year alone has given us Untraceable and Pathology. Thanks, David.
  
• Olympia Dukakis - Not so much to brag about lately.
  
• Faye Dunaway - Even less to brag about lately.
  
• Dan Fogler - An up-and-comer, he won a Tony Award in 2005. Since then his film credits include (wow): School for Scoundrels, Good Luck Chuck, and Balls of Fury.
• Tony Gilroy - Ugh.
• Richard Gladstein - Produced Best Picture nominees Pulp Fiction, The Cider House Rules, and Finding Neverland. Most recently - Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium. Nice.
  
• Russell Hornsby - Hmm, a recognizable face despite the fact that I've missed most of his work, including the recent Stuck. Probably should have been a candidate for the MLK, Jr. biopic.
• David E. Kelley - Writer for every TV show I've ignored for the last 10 years - and...Lake Placid.
  
• Julianne Moore - What?!?! Noooooooooooooo! Click me.
  
• Rosie O'Donnell - I got nothing.
• Estelle Parsons - Wow, 81 year-old Oscar winner for Bonnie & Clyde, also on TV's "Roseanne."
  
• Kim Raver - A bunch of other TV shows I've never seen - "Third Watch", "24", "The Nines", "Lipstick Jungle." Movies? How about Night at the Museum...
  
• Scott Rosenberg - Interesting resumé. Although he wrote High Fidelity, his responsibility in writing Con Air, Gone in Sixty Seconds, and Kangaroo Jack cannot be overlooked. Or over-ridiculed. Also, according to the IMDB trivia, in April 2001 he "was arrested for a bar brawl while out with Vince Vaughn and Steve Buscemi, the latter of which was stabbed three times during the scuffle." Way to make us proud, Scott.
  
• Joe Roth - This is where I die. Director of (I just can't believe this): Freedomland.
  
• Marisa Tomei - Aside from her recent appearance in Before the Devil Knows You're Dead, she's been AWOL since winning a still-controversial Oscar for My Cousin Vinny.
  

So there are some hits and misses, but I'm overall a little underwhelmed.

Fortunately, there is one last chance for BU to regain some measure of credibility: my good friend Mitch Yapko, Class of 2003. IMDB lists his production work on the "Grey's Anatomy" spin-off "Private Practice," as well as on a few upcoming films such as Good Dick, which played at Sundance 2008.

His unofficial acting resumé, however, includes (from my memory) Spider-Man 2, Herbie Fully Loaded, "Boston Public," the game show "Lingo," the reality show "Girls Behaving Badly," the legitimate show "Deadwood," and I know I've missed some others.

Thousands of alumni are counting on you, Mitch...

SNUBBED: Julianne Moore in "Freedomland"

I've been known to complain about a lot of Oscar snubs over the years, but there is one that still stings, still keeps me up at night, and still tempts me to boycott those stupid awards. That Julianne Moore didn't even receive a nomination for her performance in 2005's criminally underrated Freedomland is, to be quite frank, a travesty.

Although we all know she was stunningly stellar in such movies as The Ladies Man, Evolution, Laws of Attraction, The Forgotten, and Next, it's her turn in Freedomland that sends chills up your spine and tears down your face. I've provided evidence of one of the film's stronger moments above.

Observe her brilliance in acting like she's disoriented and panicked. Watch her navigate a sea of emotions as she fully inhabits the character of a psychotic mother. Take notes on her incredible ability to cry without actually crying.

Every great performance involves two actors, however, and Samuel L. Jackson gives an acting clinic here perhaps worthy of its own Oscar nomination. He's almost unrecognizable from his other roles here, shouting and repeatedly questioning someone while standing above them. Also, I know people with asthma, and I had to ask them if they could determine whether he was acting or not. I could not. His wheezing, huffing, groaning and puffing adds significantly to the gripping intensity of the scene.

Take this to the bank, folks: Freedomland is arguably one of the best films of the decade, and no Oscar snub discussion is complete without its mention.

Because the oversight is just so tragic, I think even more evidence may be needed to cement that claim: the first 1:17 of this long clip. I know it will be hard to tear your eyes away from the screen, but I've limited it to that so you don't become too emotionally overwhelmed.

Put my heart at rest. Put my heart at rest, AMPAS: honor Julianne Moore and Freedomland with a retroactive Academy Award...

[This post is one of many featured in Lazy Eye Theatre's Bizarro Blog-a-Thon, June 23-25. Don't bother checking out any of the other featured posts... ]

2008 P.O.V. Doc Series Kicks Off

Like I said two weeks ago, I don't have HBO, so I'll unfortunately miss the channel's summer documentary series.

So what? For the 20th year in a row, PBS is presenting its award-winning P.O.V. documentary series, starting tomorrow and continuing through the middle of October. Obviously I wont see all of them, but I've got my eye on the following films (click on the links to watch the trailers):

Week 1 (Tuesday, 6/24): Traces of the Trade

"Traces of the Trade: A Story from the Deep North is a unique and disturbing journey of discovery into the history and "living consequences" of one of the United States' most shameful episodes — slavery. In this bicentennial year of the U.S. abolition of the slave trade, one might think the tragedy of African slavery in the Americas has been exhaustively told. Katrina Browne thought the same, until she discovered that her slave-trading ancestors from Rhode Island were not an aberration. Rather, they were just the most prominent actors in the North's vast complicity in slavery, buried in myths of Northern innocence."

Week 2: Election Day

"Forget the pie charts, color-coded maps and hyperventilating pundits. What's the street-level experience of voters in today's America? In a triumph of documentary storytelling, "Election Day" combines 11 stories — shot simultaneously on November 2, 2004, from dawn until long past midnight — into one. Factory workers, ex-felons, harried moms, Native American activists and diligent poll watchers, from South Dakota to Florida, take the process of democracy into their own hands. The result is an entertaining, inspiring and sometimes unsettling story of citizens determined to vote on one fateful day."

Week 3: The Ballad of Esequiel Hernández

"In 1997, U.S. Marines patrolling the Texas-Mexico border as part of the War on Drugs shot and killed Esequiel Hernández Jr. Mistaken for a drug runner, the 18-year-old was, in fact, a U.S. citizen tending his family's goats with a .22 rifle. He became the first American killed by U.S. military forces on native soil since the 1970 Kent State shootings. "The Ballad of Esequiel Hernández," narrated by Tommy Lee Jones, explores Hernández's tragic death and its torturous aftermath. His parents and friends, the Marines on patrol and investigators discuss the dangers of militarizing the border and the death of one young man."

Week 13: Calavera Highway

"When brothers Armando and Carlos Peña set off to carry their mother’s ashes to south Texas, their road trip turns into a quest for answers about a strangely veiled past. As they reunite with five other brothers, the two men try to piece together their family’s shattered history. Why was their mother cast out by her family? What happened to their father, who disappeared during the notorious 1954 U.S. deportation program Operation Wetback? "Calavera Highway" is a sweeping story of seven Mexican-American men grappling with the meaning of masculinity, fatherhood and a legacy of rootless beginnings."

Week 14: Critical Condition (recommended if you found Sicko dishonest)

"What happens if you fall sick and are one of 47 million people in America without health insurance? "Critical Condition" by Roger Weisberg ("Waging a Living," P.O.V. 2006) puts a human face on the nation's growing health care crisis by capturing the harrowing struggles of four critically ill Americans who discover that being uninsured can cost them their jobs, health, home, savings, and even their lives. Filmed in verité style, "Critical Condition" offers a moving and invaluable exposé at a time when the nation is debating how to extend health insurance to all Americans."

Week 15: Up The Yangtze (also opening in theaters nationwide this summer)

"Nearing completion, China's massive Three Gorges Dam is altering the landscape and the lives of people living along the fabled Yangtze River. Countless ancient villages and historic locales will be submerged, and 2 million people will lose their homes and livelihoods. The Yu family desperately seeks a reprieve by sending their 16-year-old daughter to work in the cruise ship industry that has sprung up to give tourists a last glimpse of the legendary river valley. With cinematic sweep, "Up the Yangtze" explores lives transformed by the biggest hydroelectric dam in history, a hotly contested symbol of the Chinese economic miracle." (Read my full review here).

Week 16: Soldiers of Conscience

"When is it right to kill? In the midst of war, is it right to refuse? Eight U.S. soldiers, some who have killed and some who said no, reveal their inner moral dilemmas in "Soldiers of Conscience." Made with official permission of the U.S. Army, the film transcends politics to explore the tension between spiritual values and military orders. Soldiers follows the stories of both conscientious objectors and those who criticize them. Through this clash of views, the film discovers a surprising common ground: All soldiers are "soldiers of conscience," torn between the demands of duty and the call of conscience."

Winter Special: Inheritance

"Imagine watching Schindler's List and knowing the sadistic Nazi camp commandant played by Ralph Fiennes was your father. "Inheritance" is the story of Monika Hertwig, the daughter of mass murderer Amon Goeth. Hertwig has spent her life in the shadow of her father's sins, trying to come to terms with her "inheritance." She seeks out Helen Jonas-Rosenzweig, who was enslaved by Goeth and who is one of the few living eyewitnesses to his unspeakable brutality. The women's raw, emotional meeting unearths terrible truths and lingering questions about how the actions of our parents can continue to ripple through generations."

So they're not all about cupcakes, balloons and roses, but they're real and raw and, hopefully, revealing. I'll try to post reviews of the ones I see. PBS is one of the best reasons to have a TV. I have to shamefully admit I rarely watch it, but I still know it's enriching a lot more lives than most channels. Support public broadcasting!

Summer. Movies.

Despite yesterday being the official first day of the glorious season that is summer, Hollywood says we're well into it, thanks to Iron Man kicking us off on May 2. Its sequel will open on April 30, 2010. After that, who knows, the first "summer" movies will probably sneak back all the way to March. I'm against this. Very much so.

Anyway, summer is fortunately not controlled by Hollywood, and City Pages, the local alt-weekly here in Minneapolis-St. Paul, compiled a list of the summer's best local movie outings last week. The "Endless Summer of Cinema" can be found here in its entirety. It's a nice little list, despite missing this weekend's Solstice Film Festival, the Bicycle Film Festival, and the Richard Widmark Series at The Parkway (Barry Kryshka of Take-Up Productions added it in the comments section). And, of course, drive-ins, of which there are still plenty in Minnesota. Bring bug spray.

I've got a feeling I'm going to miss the majority of the "Endless Summer" movies, but I'm still kind of glad they're around so people can avoid seeing The Love Guru and Space Chimps. If you're a local, definitely mark your calendars so whoever organizes these summer series will continue to do so for years to come. Also check out the release calendar on the left sidebar for some great new releases that are on the way - blockbusters (The Dark Knight), documentaries (American Teen), and indies (Towelhead).

I've got 3 weddings and at least 3-4 trips in the next 60 days alone, so you'll have to forgive me for posting less frequently. Tragic I know, but I'm sure you'll manage. If I happen to be absent for a few days, check out the great blogs over on the left.

Happy summer.

REVIEW: Roman de Gare (B+)

Background: I find it interesting that just a few months after octogenarian Sidney Lumet's Before the Devil Knows You're Dead was released, we have a new film, Roman de Gare, from septuagenarian Claude Lelouch, perhaps best known for winning the 1966 Best Screenplay for A Man and a Woman. Both Lumet's and Lelouch's newest films are suspenseful and depend on interweaving plots and time fractures, but I haven't seen a critical mass of either's films to know if that is a departure from their style. Lelouch, for his part, admits that he made Roman de Gare "to send a message to those who dismiss my work," even going so far as to direct the film under a pseudonym. Fans of French cinema may recognize Fanny Ardant (Paris je t'aime, 8 Women), and fans of Audrey Tautou will recognize Dominique Pinon from both Amélie and A Very Long Engagement. Rounding out the cast is Audrey Dana, whose performance here earned her a nomination for Most Promising Actress at the 2008 César Awards (the French Oscars).

Synopsis : (Because saying too much here could give away half the movie, I'm not going to go very far.) Best-selling novelist Judith Ralitzer (Ardent) is being questioned by the police following the mysterious death of a man rumored to be her ghostwriter. Meanwhile, news reports tell us a convicted child rapist/pedophile/serial killer known as "The Magician" has escaped from a Paris prison and is currently at large. Huguette (Dana) and her fiance, Paul, are arguing in the car on the way to her family's farm. They stop for gas at a rest stop and, in a fit of rage, Paul takes off and leaves Huguette stranded. Inside the rest stop, a mysterious man (Pinon) is loitering and performing magic tricks for kids traveling with their parents. He eyes Huguette and asks her if he can give her a ride. Desperate to show her parents that she can stay in a relationship, she not only accepts, but asks the man if he will pretend to be her fiance and accompany her on her trip home. This is about 20 minutes in, but it's best to let the rest happen on the screen.

I Loved:
+ The gripping suspense and uncomfortable feelings of anxiety.
+ Dominique Pinon, whose understated acting here was perfect for his mysterious role.

I Liked:
+ Audrey Dana, who never played her character over the top. Very natural - I think she's one to watch.
+ All of the scenes in the car with Pinon and Dana chatting.

I Disliked:
- The ending. Not so much how it happened, but what happened. I think I wanted a different twist.

I Hated:
- Rien.

Grade:
Writing - 9
Acting - 10
Production - 8
Emotional Impact - 9
Music - 4
Significance - 4

Total: 44/50 = 88% = B+

Last Word: It's a shame that when Alfred Hitchcock's name is thrown around these days, it's usually in relation to somebody like M. Night Shyamalan. Plenty of other filmmakers, including Claude Lelouch, are consistently proving to be masters of suspense. In the case of Roman de Gare, Lelouch has created somewhat of a self-fulfilling prophecy. The title refers to the type of "airport" or "train station" novel that you happen to pick up at the boarding gate and devour by the time you reach your destination, fully entertained but not quite satisfied. Such was my experience with this film. It didn't lose my attention for a minute, but for all that work I was hoping for a bigger payoff. This is not to say the movie doesn't end well; that's more a matter of taste. Roman de Gare is a great little mystery movie where all the players know their parts, and I recommend it for the patient viewer who's looking for some smart entertainment. In fact, in as much as it's an "airport novel," it might make for a good in-flight movie...

Short Cuts: "You're Just a Kid"

Good Will Hunting (1997). Directed by Gus Van Sant; written by Matt Damon and Ben Affleck; starring Matt Damon, Ben Affleck, Robin Williams, Minnie Driver, Stellan Skarsgård, Casey Affleck, and Cole Hauser.

300 Words About: The Happening

It's OK, Jess, it's OK. At least we're not in the theater watching this.

"We've sensed it. We've seen the signs. Now...It's Happening." That's not just the official tagline for The Happening, it's also a perfect summation of my expectations of M. Night Shyamalan's latest offering. I "sensed" it would be the uncontested worst film of the year, I saw the "signs" (simply his last movie, Lady in the Water), and now, indeed, it "happened". On Friday the 13th, Shyamalan pulled the veil off his latest disaster, and once again people are flocking to see it. I vowed I wouldn't pay for it. In a fit of confusion, I ended up paying for it. At least I illegally paid the student price, saving $1.50 in one of my wisest financial decisions in years.

To paraphrase the classic bit from Denny Green, it's clear that Shyamalan "is who we thought he was": the most self-righteous and contemptuous filmmaker currently working in Hollywood. It would defy logic to argue that he's unaware of how bad his movies are, but instead of seeking to make any improvements, he stubbornly continues to try to convince us that we're idiots, and that his conspicuous messages are the new gospel for mankind.

That's the real problem. It's not that the writing and acting are horrid, or that sense and logic are missing from the first frame onward, or that the thrills and chills are about five movies tired now after The Sixth Sense. It's not the terrible supporting characters or the unconvincing special effects or even the worst fake newscasts I've ever seen.

It's that in the middle of all of this, just when the movie should start making fun of itself, Shyamalan again throws a serious message or clichéd fright (e.g., doll on the bed) at us. In short, the difference between garbage like Jumper or Meet the Spartans (my favorite whipping post if you didn't notice) and garbage like The Happening is that garbage like The Happening tries to be serious.

Although Shyamalan preaches, "This is the best B movie that you will ever see," his sincere attempts at romance, suspense, and drama, combined with the heavy-handed message about Mother Nature's wrath, prove (at least to me) that he's just making excuses for the terrible reception. He had plenty of opportunity to make this over-the-top ridiculous - if that was his intention. Instead, he predictably implies that we're morons for not getting it.

I saw The Happening to find out if he could make a movie more offensively awful than Lady in the Water. Is it? I still don't know since it seems comparing two epically bad movies is as difficult as comparing two epically good ones, but I nevertheless truly recommend seeing either one (don't pay for it) in order to sharpen your movie senses.