December 16, 2008

Reel Life #3

I'm overwhelmed with articles for Reel Life, the occasional feature where I highlight news nuggets that I believe lend themselves well to film adaptations, so I might have to do another edition of this sooner than I thought. I'm trying to keep up with what's been in the news in the last month, but I still have some old ones I haven't checked off so it might be a while before I'm fully current. The running motto, as usual, is:

"This feature gets to the heart of my blogging and general film philosophy: bringing that which I see on screen into real world applications for my daily life. With these examples, the flow just happens to be in the opposite direction. As always, please share your comments on these stories and feel free to suggest or email me others that you find. All rights reserved if any Reel Life stories ever make their way to the big screen..."
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"Do they really think the Earth is flat?"

This is outrageous. Truly mind-boggling. You've heard of people who hold onto conspiracy theories about America's moon landing being a hoax, but how about those who also refuse to believe the Earth is round? The Flat Earth Society, comprised of people from around the world (or should it be across the world?) believe the Earth is flat and horizontally infinite. The North Pole is the dot in the middle, and Antarctica is the border around the disc that prevents you from actually sailing off the edge of the Earth. A documentary needs to be made about these "flat-earthers" because I'm endlessly fascinated at how they can deny reality. Or, somebody could take the story and run with it - "Journey to the Center of the Earth" but inside out: "Journey to the End of the Earth". Brilliant, so long as it doesn't star Brendan Fraser.

Story Potential: High
Project Possibilities: Feature length film; feature length documentary
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"Minnesotan teens are sick freaks"

Actually I made up that headline, but enough disgusting stories have popped up recently that it's curiously disturbing, and two articles in particular lay out the depraved behavior going on around here. In Lakeville (possibly known to you as the exurb where an unfortunate voter thought Obama was an "Arab"), four teens lured a mentally disabled man to a rural location and tied him to a tree, beating, burning, and torturing him before knocking him unconscious over the course of two days (and not before dragging him behind a motorcycle for 200 feet). If you're psychopathic, I guess you would psychopathically say he "deserved it" if he had done something terrible. But he didn't - he didn't do anything, in fact, other than befriend a crazy 16 year-old girl who sicced her crazy friends on the completely defenseless 24 year-old for literally no reason at all. It's the kind of story that keeps you awake at night.

And if you do fall asleep you'll have nightmares about your loved ones in the local nursing home. In Albert Lea (two hours south of the Twin Cities), six teens were charged with sexual abusing and taunting the elderly residents. Read the attached abuse reports for the horrific details. The only thing more disgusting than the story itself is the fact the teens, pictured in the article, will probably smile and giggle their way out of their just punishment: hard time in prison and years of psychotherapy. Even worse, one of the girls' fathers came out in their defense after the girls admitted the abuse, explaining that they were simply "carrying out the duties of their job."

I'm not interested in a horror movie made from these stories, but a documentary on the terrifying future of America. How do humans like this exist, and how can their behavior, if not their reproduction altogether, be stopped immediately?

Story Potential: Limited
Project Possibilities: Feature length documentary
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"Combat to college"

When the U.S. went to war in Iraq five years ago, I kept on finding dead ends in conversations with people when I brought up the number of veterans we were going to have in this country in the future. Almost two million men and women, mostly from my generation, have served in Iraq or Afghanistan since 2001. Of them, "only" about 4,000 have lost their lives (medical technology and military strategy have significantly decreased casualties, but increased the number of wounded). The rest will be living and working with you and I for the rest of our lives, depending on our taxes to support the social services they need to survive. Apparently people are only now waking up to this fact? The short-sightedness is breathtaking. Anyway, veterans have already seen some time on the big screen (the best examples being The War Tapes and Stop-Loss), but this issue is not going to go away anytime soon (it's about to get much bigger in our lives, actually), and this article about returning vets heading to college provides some interesting and fresh material for future projects.

Story Potential: High
Project Possibilities: Feature length film; feature length documentary
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"In Mexico drug war, sorting good guys from bad"

In Mexico in the last year alone, nearly 5,000 people have been senselessly murdered, many of them innocent civilians caught in the crossfire of one of the most shocking drug wars of our time. The police are the drug kingpins are the prosecutors are the mob bosses, and all other people are potential pawns, fair game to be used as ammo, collateral, and ransom payment. No one can be trusted and everyone's corrupt. It's articles like this that need to be read by Americans having fits about an influx of our neighbors to the South, if only to understand that these people are almost approaching refugee status in Mexico as it becomes an increasingly lawless place. I would argue that building up our borders is not going to stop those desperate to flee that country, so energy might be better spent developing Mexican infrastructure and stopping this out-of-control drug war, thus killing two birds with one stone? Maybe a movie will provide some insights.

Story Potential: Very High
Project Possibilities: Feature length film; feature length documentary
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"Chinese girl gets 'kiss of deaf'"

This screams "silly romantic comedy for February or March release": a 20-something Chinese girl went partially deaf after receiving a passionate kiss from her boyfriend, prompting a series of media warnings about the "dangers of excessive kissing". Isn't Drew Barrymore permanently on call for roles like this?

Story Potential: Low to Moderate
Project Possibilities: Feature length film

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"Pirates' luxury lifestyles on lawless coasts"

Crawl out of your cave if you still haven't heard about the unprecedented pirate attacks off the coast of Somalia. With ransom payments going over the $30 million mark, these pirates are essentially creating a new industry for a nation desperately trying to keep itself together. While the West wrings its hands about how to get its ships through the treacherous waters, rural villagers in Somalia can hardly complain about the luxurious benefits they're receiving as a trickle-down effect of the piracy. Will this story end - and how?

Story Potential: Moderate to High
Project Possibilities: Feature length film

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"Mysterious piano in woods perplexes police"

A Baldwin Acrosonic piano was found by a woman walking in the woods near Harwich, MA. The piano was in tune, in good working order, and was positioned with a bench in place for an inspired passerby to sit on. You could go in all kinds of directions with this one: a documentary about pollution, a horror flick about musical ghosts, a sci-fi drama about an ancient piano that travels through time and gets played by famous people in history, a kid's movie about a piano-playing forest animal, and so on and so forth. Alright so maybe I wouldn't make a very good producer, but something about this one makes me feel like it could work well in the hands of a creative writer or director.

Story Potential: High
Project Possibilities: Feature length film
, documentary short
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10 comments:

  1. These are all great. I would love to see a film about the piano. It's really a lovely idea and has a kind of Chocolat feel to it. I did see a terrific short film called Appassionata that kind of deals with this idea. It is based ona WWII legend.

    Do you thing the Rod Blagojevich story needs to be told?

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  2. That movie sounds amazing, Marilyn. I've never heard of but now I've also been reminded of The Pianist. Sometimes the little random occurrences in life, like a mysterious piano, allow for the most imaginative interpretations.

    Who's Rod Blagojevich? Just kidding. I'm sure you're pretty wound up about that ordeal, as most Illinois residents would be. I think had he actually gone through with the sale and had there been some more evil motives at work other than outright greed, it may have made for a better movie. However, it appears that was all that drove the Bernard Madoff scam, and I think that story sounds like it might have some potential. How does one man bring the SEC and the world's largest financial firms to their knees? There could be some fun in casting that one as well.

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  3. If the Blago story were to make it to film, I'd love to see Jeffrey Combs as the Gov. Not only does he have the last name so in keeping with Blago's hair obsession, but he plays madness so well. And let's face it, Rod is Odd.

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  4. Wow, he looks like him, too!

    What is with elected officials and their haircuts? They're never bald, are they? People probably consider it a sign of weakness or something silly.

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  5. These all sound like good ideas. After all, the best movie and book plots come from real life, not some screenwriter's fever dreams.

    The two cases involving callous teens are particularly horrifying. Blech.

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  6. I agree on all counts, Sarah. Glad you found these interesting.

    The story with the teens (the first one) reminds me of the movie "Bully", which was also based on a horrifying true story. I actually thought it was a pretty good movie, but it didn't offer much comfort. Sometimes I wonder the motives of movies like that (i.e., Elephant) are - just to rub our face in the awful truth?

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  7. Daniel--

    Horrifying films about real-life events always share the same purpose in my mind. They are meant to enlighten, shock and stir.

    The most earnest films of that type try to offer a solution or hope that such crises can be averted in the future. The most honest of those films acknowledge the utter bleakness of the situation.

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  8. The shocking and stirring I get, if not always the enlightening. Clearly I think there is place for bad news on the big screen - half of the stories I choose are tragic, but occasionally I get frustrated when stories are presented without any hopeful resolution at all. Elephant, for example, does nothing but document the Columbine shootings. It's absolutely horrifying and it serves a reminder of how evil people can be - but is that all? Is that the end of the story?

    On the other hand, something like United 93 does the exact same thing, and that was the best movie I saw in 2006. Clearly my opinions on this are all over the map!

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  9. YES! This is the best feature around. Love it.

    An Adam Sandler/Drew Barrymore flick about a guy who kisses girls into deafness should be headed into production any day now.

    Terry Gilliam should helm the Flat Earth project. Sort of Time Bandits style flick. Coolness.

    No movie should ever be made about those sick Minnesotan fucks. Maybe a documentary about their death penalty proceedings. I'd watch that. Put their executions on Pay-Per-View.

    Combat to College is definitely the story here that most deserves to be told. Very important.

    My fiance's family always goes down to Mexico for Christmas for charity purposes. This year, reports of nine police officers who had their heads chopped off in the town they stay in made the news. Needless to stay, they're enjoying their hot chocolate at home this year.

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  10. Wow, Scott, that's freaky about your Mexico connection. I saw that story in the news and shook my head.

    Did you see Stop-Loss? It's a lot like Combat to College...just without the college part.

    Thanks for faithfully checking out this feature.

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