April 28, 2008

"What You Crave!": Idiotic Teens

The Minneapolis Star Tribune reports on a weekend break-in at the Plaza Maplewood Theatre, one of the few discount theaters left in the area. Is nothing sacred? Likely upset at the $1.50 ticket prices during the economic slowdown, two teens broke in Saturday night and, instead of playing classic films or setting up their XBOX 360 on the big screen, they trashed the place for about $20,000 worth of damage. Plaza Maplewood will be closed for an indefinite period for cleaning and repairs, and hopefully this won't signal the downfall of yet another Twin Cities discount theater.

"A janitor who arrived for work at 8 a.m. Sunday found a door ajar. Inside he found candy, popcorn, broken soda bottles and White Castle wrappers strewn all over. Vandals smashed the glass on arcade games, a
concession counter and a refrigerator, defaced the ticket booth with red marker, sprayed blue paint on walls and punctured the screen. A fire extinguisher found lying in a doorway apparently had been used to spray the seats, a police report said."

I'm not a detective or a forensic scientist, but this who-dun-it can clearly be linked to the original culprit: White Castle. If only we could reinstitute Hammurabi's Law and sentence these enemy combatants (terrorism against film) to eat $20,000 worth of sliders - maybe while sitting through a double feature of two of the theater's current offerings: The Eye and Vantage Point.

"Lt. Dave Kvam was unsure of a motive, but that it might be 'some kind of perverse pleasure.'"

The vandalism or the burgers?

4 comments:

  1. Destruction of other's property makes me physically ill. There's no excuse on the planet for it. I speak from first hand experience, as my car was keyed two separate time my senior year of high school by a former "friend."

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  2. Ouch. Never had the pain of a car keying, but just thinking about it makes me cringe.

    This crime strikes me as so primitively dumb. What purpose or motive was driving them? Spraying a seat with a fire extinguisher doesn't even sound like fun to me. Am I missing something? Oh yeah, they were high on sliders. Common sense and/or critical thought goes out the window.

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  3. Booo.

    I love sliders. They never send me into a destructive rage... they just make the atmosphere around me a little less than fresh for a few days.

    I can't understand how anyone could derive "pleasure" from property destruction like that. Is it possible they don't understand the harm they're inflicting on not only the owners of the property, but (now unemployed) theater employees and (now unentertained) patrons?

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  4. Hehe, was it unfair for me to attack WC if I've actually never been there?

    Anyway, you're both right. There's no excuse and there probably won't be justice, either.

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